truth be told

"Yes, I have loved you with an everlasting love; Therefore with lovingkindness I have drawn you." Jeremiah 31:3 (NKJ)

Saturday, August 26, 2006

I'm on the hunt for a new blog template. This was the first one that caught my attention. I kept thinking "This world is not my home. This world is not my home. I don't want to be of this world." ...kind of suited it. But is it a little weird? A little freaky? Or does it work?

Anyway, life is good. It's been a while since I've posted. I've felt no need to say anything lately...

I thank God for my house daily. He has blessed me.
I thank God for my family daily. He has blessed me.
I thank God for saving me daily. HE HAS BLESSED ME!
I thank God for His revelation. HE HAS SAVED ME!

I'm reading The Heavenly Man right now. Thanks to Johan for letting me borrow it. If any of you don't know what this book is about....it's about the life of Brother Yun in China, his faith in God, his courage, strength and God's call on his life. You should read it if you haven't. This book has stirred my heart, challenged my faith and has left me sitting there with my mouth gaping open. I heard lots about this book before I read it but God's been speaking to me as I read through it. I've said a number of times before that I believe the only way I'll be able to stand torture or martyrdom is number 1) by the grace of God and number 2) by singing. I think I'm even more sure about this now.

Singing does something to my heart that nothing else does. It releases worship, thankfulness, humility, and it draws my heart closer to Jesus. As I sing my heart softens. I get revelation. This recipricated love relationship starts to happen. I feel His affection for me and my heart is stirred to sing. I see a glimpse of His beauty or glory, my heart is compelled to sing. I sing because I know of His lovingkindness and sovereignty, and I start to feel His affection and I see Him more clearly.

So picture this. You're in a dark, damp cell. You've been badly beaten. AND YOU START TO SING about the glory of God. About His beauty, holiness and lovingkindess! POW! That takes your heart to a totally different place!! Instead of going into self-pity or hatred (which are very relevant feelings at that moment, don't get me wrong)...but instead of going there, you turn your heart and focus on the One who loves you. You gaze upon His beauty. As you sing, your heart remembers that your home is not on this earth. Your home is in Heaven. You are made for eternity! You are made for this love affair with our Bridegroom King. And you know He is judge. You know that when Christ returns He will right all that is wrong. He will judge the living and the dead. And from that revelation, your heart is softened again. You begin to pray for those who have persecuted you. You know there destiny, as it stands, is not with Christ. Eternal seperation from Him. Hell. Compassion rises in your heart and you begin to pray for their salvation.

Singing brings my heart into alignment with God.

I still struggle with insecurity and distraction while singing, but this is my heart for it. This is what I am called to. I am called to sing of His glory and splendor. I am called to align my heart with His. To worship Him in Spirit and in Truth. To preach the good news of His salvation and love. To pray for His Kingdom to come and His will to be done. To live for Him. To love others the way He loves them.

I don't want to spend my time doing things for God and missing Him in the midst of it. My greatest fear would be to "do" lots and know Him little. I want to know Him more than anything. I want to stir my spirit (or pray that the Holy Spirit would stir my spirit) to action in my relationsip with Jesus. I am so inactive in pursuing Him and yet I've had a tiny glimpse of revelation of what reality truly is.

O God I ask that I would seek You first.